feelings, re-visited

Maybe it's the cold rainy weather making me all poetic inside...I suddenly remembered something I wrote sometime back.

This is from my archived blog entry dated THURSDAY APRIL 13 2006.
It portrays my feelings back then... feelings which I still feel now, but only in my dreams.

I am here. I am floating.
I am ice beneath the cold.
I am a body without a soul.
My mind is a whirlwind of trapped emotions and my heart beats to the rhythm of sad songs.
My needs, my wants, my hopes and desires...lost in time & better forgotten, like a distinguished fire.
You see me and you see her.
I see myself and it's just a mirror.
I laugh, I smile, I frown and I cry.
I am merely living her life, a life that she left & never wanted to return to.
She was full of energy, full of dreams.
Most of all, she was full of love.
It radiated from within her, and it was the pulse of her very existence.
She gave her love to you but you threw it away.
Over & over, you tormented her soul with empty promises & false hopes.
She still loves you.
Yes she does.
But she is no more.
She is gone.
In her place, is a living doll.
In her place, is me.